nostalgia

Nostalgia is getting the best of me, as it often does. Little encouragement is needed to 'take me back'. I find that it is rarely a particular time or event that occupies my thoughts when I'm feeling this way. In fact, my memory is quite poor when it comes to specifics. Inevitably there are those events I sometimes revisit -- family vacations, reunions, playing in the yard at home, road trips in the maxivan, that time such and such happened -- but even those memories are accompanied by a pervading sentiment.

It isn't the particulars I'm drawn back to... it's the moments, the impressions and the underlying ambiance.  You know? I think of how I felt sitting on my daddy's lap, or having my brothers teach me how to dive over the edge of the pool (ugh, a story for another time), or piling in the van for yet another road trip, or singing in the playroom, or playing farm in the yard, or learning to ride a bike, or having picnics in the yard, or having my nieces play with my hair, or performing dances in the playground for our families when we were camping, or just being part of a big and wonderful family.

I love to sit in those moments and let the feelings wash over me -- security, friendship, affection, liberation, joy, belonging, support, safety, peace, confidence, curiosity, hope.

You know?

I don't know when I started being such a sentimental person. I think I always was, but the longer you live the more you have to be sentimental about. And who cares? I love being sentimental. I love days that I feel nostalgic. I love sifting through memories of this wonderful life I am blessed with.

You know?